When You Don’t Fit in: Thriving in a World You Feel Separate From

Maybe you look different. Maybe you live different. You’re a creature of a world all your own. This can be a great thing. Some people build their entire identities around it.

Not fitting in can also feel crappy. The outcasts, the loners, the people who put on fake smiles while they’re secretly grimacing at how frustrating it is to be so different from everyone around them—they all know this. Sometimes, the feeling only lasts a moment. Like when you’re the only person in a group discussion who disagrees with something. It can also be a lifelong thing. Or maybe feeling misunderstood by the people around you is a constant. You might even feel like you were born on the wrong planet.

Oh, I’m an INFJ—That’s Why I’m Weird

You can be blessed with close friends but still feel at odds with society in some way. That’s me. I’ve known for years I’m an INFJ, but it was only recently that I really started reading about what that meant. It’s the rarest personality type on the planet, apparently. I guess that makes sense.

Personality Page says:

“INFJs are protective of their inner selves, sharing only what they choose to share when they choose to share it. They are deep, complex individuals, who are quite private and typically difficult to understand.”

I like that there’s documentation of my complexity and all, but other personality types feel misunderstood too. There’s enough differences in the world that everyone feels that way sometimes. Whether you were “born on the wrong planet” or not, you’re meant to be here, and that’s important to know. Your presence will change the story of life on Earth. This is always true but especially if you make an effort to be remembered for your unique gifts.

Fully Utilize the Internet

This seems obvious since you’re online right now, but just in case it isn’t: take advantage of the web. No matter what you’re into or how you feel about any aspect of existence, someone out there is feeling the same. I’ve been on forums for long hair, colorful hair, cooking, skincare, health, dancing, unique/free spirituality, general exercise, arts and crafts, and of course, writing. I’ve met so many interesting friends this way.

If you really feel alone with your ideas, consider starting a blog so you can introduce your unique perspectives to the world. There might be others like you out there. Not everyone knows how to express themselves. If you can and feel the desire to, you should!

Relocate—with Realistic Expectations

Some people go out and search for a place that feels right for them. Edge of Something More is about a search like that. After living in three states, I don’t think I “belong” anywhere. Maybe I’ll feel different in the future, but I kind of doubt it. I’ve had happy experiences many places. The world is beautiful all over. Traveling is always worth it, but making a permanent move is a different thing.

If you do relocate:

  • Know what you’re looking for and why. The more you have at stake, the more you want solid, dependable reasons for doing what you’re doing. Being in love with the local music scene or a nearby national park is dependable. Being in love with a girl you met online three days ago is less so, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t go for it. Just look at what you have to gain versus what you have to lose, and then go with what feels right.
  • Don’t build the place up too much. An atmosphere more conducive to your landscape is a valuable thing, but it’s never good to expect more than a place can offer. Sometimes feelings change over time as well. The excitement of a new place wears off.
  • Don’t get dragged down by negativity. People can be harsh on places, so keep in mind that you might love what someone else hates.
  • Be serious about climate. If you’re like me and can’t deal with winter, a lot of locations are off the list. I didn’t realize this about myself until I had traveled quite a bit. The first snowy winter was exciting and fun. After that, not so much.

Live Your Way

I was okay until I reached kindergarten and people started demanding I get up at a certain time and do a bunch of stuff I didn’t want to do. I was depressed a lot of my life. Not only did I feel like a weirdo, but I also had a bunch of health problems. Somewhere in my twenties I figured out that living my way is my only chance of survival.

Don’t let society force you into a mold or a life plan that doesn’t work for you. There are all millions of lifestyles, and they all rock as long as you’re in alignment with your real self and not hurting anyone else.

Moments of Connection

Chances are that you do fit in and don’t realize it. At least in a lot of small ways. I try to notice those ways and point them out to myself. For example, I feel that connection to the world around me when:

  • Sharing humor. I love seeing the memes people make. Some of them are so awesome that it makes me love the human race once again.
  • Interacting with other writers. It’s such a huge part of me. Even the writers who get me the least still align with me more than a lot of the world.
  • Watching television. Connecting to other people in TV fandoms has always been fun for me. I plan on doing more TV recaps and rants on this and my other blog soon.
  • Talking about relationships. There are only so many different problems and situations. It’s easy to connect to people on the subjects of sex, love, and heartbreak.

Just be You

Never accept toxic relationships in the name of fitting in. People who put you down for being different don’t deserve your time or energy. Being unique is setting an example. I’ve been influenced by many brave individuals who set examples for me over the years, and I’m thankful.Those who clash with society help change it, so speak your mind and do what you want.

Advertisements

Writerly Wednesday: Sorry for Vanishing

Hi guys! This #WriterlyWednesday, I want to apologize for ignoring my blog.

A lot has been going on. I’m going hard at the third rewrite of my new romance, which now has a working title: Since Vientiane. This story has all the elements I love: travel, serendipity, hot chemistry, and plenty of color. I wanted to take some of my own experiences in Southeast Asia and twist them into something even better. It still has a long way to go, but it’s a solid book now, which is exciting!

I’ve been brainstorming a lot of new ideas I’m not sure how to get into just yet. This is a strange time in my life. Removing myself from the dating scene has been a valuable experience that has given me new perspectives. It’s a lot to process, so that’s what I’ve been doing. Processing, thinking, growing, praying, expanding, brainstorming–and working my ass off so I can build the life I want.

I hope to put out a lot of entertaining stuff for you guys, but the process is slow and frustrating. I have so many projects planned that I could work 24/7 for the next decade and still only put a small dent in what I want to do. And that’s just when it comes to the books.I also want to blog, not just to promote my books but to have the chance to help people in some small way.

You guys come here and read my blogs every single day, and that makes me happy. Thank you for your support. I hope you’ll hang in there and give me the chance to get back into this one day soon.

__

Check me out on Goodreads

Get Edge of Something More, my first novel from Swoon Romance

The Loss of a Friend: Saying Goodbye to Frogger

Fifteen years ago, I walked into a friend’s house and spotted the tiniest, most beautiful gray-and-white kitten I had ever seen. He was a stray that had been abandoned on a local freeway. My friend’s mom stopped and rescued him—an act of kindness that ended up connecting me to one of the great loves of my life.
20150724_171915Frogger (full name: Frogger Friend) was always meant for me. It was obvious as soon as we met. He crawled up on my chest, purred, and looked right into my eyes. It was love at first sight. My friend told me he was a girl, and I never bothered to check myself, so for the first few months of his life, I went around calling him my “beautiful princess.” I even gave him a pink collar. Imagine my surprise when it was time to get him spayed, and I found out I actually had a little prince.

Once his gender-identity crisis was figured out, he became my boy. We moved through various homes and apartments together, and he was by my side through so much. I have struggled with depression and other serious health problems, and he provided support for me. Always in tune with my emotions, he would come to me when I was upset. Sometimes, something as simple as his paw on my leg would be enough to keep me going another day.

He did so many cute things that brought everyone who knew him joy. Running across the room and leaping into the piles of newspapers on the floor. Going crazy playing with his toys until he became “overwhelmed” and had to hide behind the living room curtains for a few minutes (he did this every time!). Sucking on his paw and making sweet

IMG_20150810_200657

Frogger had a way of looking into your soul.

little noises as he was falling asleep. Sitting and staring at me, sometimes for hours, as I worked at the computer. I never had another cat that would make unwavering eye contact like that. He loved being near me. I wouldn’t even have to be petting him. I could just turn and look at him, and he would begin purring.

There were gaps in our time together. In my late twenties, I had a difficult decision to make. I felt the intense desire to travel, which meant I would have to leave Frogger behind with my family. I spent five years away from home, experiencing many adventures and learning many lessons. Whenever I came home to visit, his eyes would light up, and he would purr. He never forgot me, even when I was away for over a year.

This last year, I decided to come home to California for good. When I arrived, Frogger was much thinner and weaker than he had been the last time I saw him. I promised him that for the rest of his life, I would be here. I wouldn’t be leaving him again.

We shared many beautiful moments during these last few months. He wasn’t the playful kitten he 20150807_131926once was, but he was still my kitten. After the vet told us there wasn’t any hope, all we could do was take him home and try to make the most of our time with him. As the end grew closer, he didn’t want to leave my side. Days were spent with him curled up beside me as I worked at my computer. Sometimes, he liked to rest his head on my mouse pad. Just to make sure I would remember to pet him. Of course I did.

Today, on February 13th at 2:10 PM, Frogger Friend took his final breath and then crossed over into God’s loving arms. I know he will be waiting for me when it’s my time to pass. Our souls have shared many existences, and we will be together again. I feel blessed to have known him and to continue to know and remember him throughout the rest of my days.

IMG_20160208_224321

RIP Frogger Friend 2000-2016

Writerly Wednesday: Letting People Read Your Sex Scenes

Since it’s almost Valentine’s Day, this #writerlywednesday I thought I’d talk about something that has been on my mind since I began writing: sex scenes.

I always knew that sex would be included in my writing. I like raw, emotional stories with both fantastical elements and a realistic edge. Even when I don’t show sex, my characters talk about it openly. Why wouldn’t they? It’s a part of the human experience. It’s the same with drugs. Or violence.

A simple truth about writing is that people are going to witness the stuff you think about. With sex scenes, you’re giving them a view into some small part of your erotic mind. Sure, I could sit down and piece together a scene that wasn’t at all based on my own desires. But what fun is that? Not that I’m an expert on writing arousing sex scenes or anything. I just figure if I’m turned on, someone else might be too.

That’s why it’s creepy to think about family members reading it.

There are a few routes you can take with this:

  • Conform your writing to a standard you feel comfortable sharing.
  • Write sex scenes, but tone them down as much as you can.
  • Adopt the life of a hermit and put out freakier sex scenes with each book.
  • Take the IDGAF approach. Write what you want. Get as freaky as you want. If it ever gets brought up, be willing to talk about it openly, because it’s your scene. You should be proud of it.

I’m pretty down with the IDGAF approach. Whether there’s anything “freaky” in Edge of Something More (my previously published book) is a matter of perspective. There’s what I would consider a normal amount of sex and sexual talk. My other books will probably have more. I’ve grown and matured a lot since I started working on this book many years ago.

I don’t think my parents have read much of my writing, but they know it includes this sort of content, and they don’t care. I am lucky to have a pretty laid-back, liberal family. No matter what, they are supportive of me working hard toward something I believe in. Plus, I was pretty wild when I was younger, so the fact that my stories show sex and drug use isn’t that much of a surprise to anyone.

In life, you have to do you. I’ll continue to write what I want and hope it finds its way into the hands of those who will enjoy it as much as I do. That’s all I really care about.

My Response to “5 Reasons Marriage Doesn’t Work Anymore”

By now, a lot of you have probably seen the viral article “5 Reasons Marriage Doesn’t Work Anymore” floating around social media. It was written by 29-year-old Anthony D’Ambrosio, who has a popular column in the Ashbury Park Press. D’Ambrosio is also a divorcee, and he seems to have little hope that marriage will ever work for the younger generation.

 

Here is the original article: http://www.12news.com/story/news/2015/12/31/sex-columnist-5-reasons-marriage-doesnt-work-anymore/78123994/

 

This whole thing rubbed me wrong. It’s clear that I’m far from the only person who felt this way. There have been numerous rebuttals, some of which are also going viral. After reading a few of those, I felt like I should write my own. I’m single, and I’ve never been married, but I have experienced a few long-term relationships that were like marriages, so I do relate. Also, as a romance author, I tend to think about human relationships a lot.

 

Before I go any further, I should point out that I too am unsure whether marriage is realistic in this day and age, or whether it’s ever been realistic in any age. I don’t place any value on getting married myself, at least not in the legal sense. I wanted to get married when I was younger, and looking back, I think it was only social conditioning that caused me to feel that way. Therefore, while I’m not closed off to the idea of marriage, I do agree with D’Ambrosio that for most people, a lifelong marriage isn’t realistic. I just disagree on the reasons why.

 

D’Ambrosio’s Five Points: My Rebuttal

 

I’m just going to go through the article and quote, and then respond to, the parts that I found annoying.

“I’ve spent the better part of the last three years trying to understand the dating scene again. Back when I met my ex-wife in 2004, things were just so different. Social media had yet to explode. I had this desire to ask her about her day simply because I didn’t know.”

 

 

That wasn’t one of his main points, but right off the bat, it irked me. No matter how much we might vent about our day on social media, people still go home and talk to their partners. This guy acts like people just come home and sit in silence because once you’ve mentioned something on social media, that’s it. You can never talk about it again. Sorry but that’s just not reality.

When something is really bothering me, I’ll vent about it on social media, then I’ll vent about it in real life, too. People still talk. Healthy, happy couples still talk. Unhappy, unhealthy couples have never communicated properly, and that was true long before social media.

 

Okay, now to the main points:

 

  1. “Sex becomes almost non-existent.”

I’m baffled by couples who neglect having sex, especially younger ones. We all desire physical connection, so how does cutting that off lead you to believe your marriage will be successful? It’s like telling someone you’ll take them out to a restaurant but they can’t order food.”

Uhhh… okay. Who are these couples who have just decided to stop having sex? I’m sure it can’t be denied that having children or being super busy can get in the way of your sex life, and chemistry and attraction can dry up between people for a number of reasons.  But D’Ambrosio seems to be implying that today’s young couples have made some sort of anti-sex pact, and I’ve never heard of such a thing.

 

If anything, people are more sexually free today than ever. Women are more open to discussing their desires, and there’s a lot less stigma about acting out whatever your kink might be. Look at the mainstream success of Fifty Shades of Gray. We liked it, and we weren’t afraid to show it.

It’s not just boredom that stops sex from happening. Everywhere you look, there’s pictures of men and women we know half naked — some look better than your husband or wife. So it becomes desirable. It’s in your face every single day and changes your mindset.”

Everywhere D’Ambrosio looks, he sees men and women he knows half naked? Interesting. I can’t even think of the last time I saw one of my friends half naked.

“It’s no wonder why insecurities loom so largely these days. You have to be perfect to keep someone attracted to you. Meanwhile, what your lover should really be attracted to is your heart. Maybe if you felt that connection beyond a physical level, would you realize a sexual attraction you’ve never felt before.”

I don’t think that’s true. I’ve dated a variety of men, and most of them haven’t expected physical perfection at all. If anything, it was the opposite. They thought I was beautiful in sweatpants and no makeup. Most people don’t look like movie stars in everyday life—not even movie stars. I don’t think that’s ever stopped anyone from getting it on.

I’m not saying there are never exceptions, just that out of all the issues we have in our society, I don’t see how a lack of desire for sex is one of them. When a couple stops having sex, it’s because something else is wrong. It seems D’Ambrosio is identifying a symptom, not a cause.

 

  1. “Finances cripple us.”

“Years ago, it didn’t cost upward of $200,000 for an education. It also didn’t cost $300,000-plus for a home.

The cost of living was very different than what it is now. You’d be naive to believe this stress doesn’t cause strain on marriages today.”

People also make more money today than they did decades ago. It’s all relative. If anything, wouldn’t harder financial times make people want to get—and stay—married? Things are easier if you have a partner that you trust to share finances with.

“You need to find a job to pay for student loans, a mortgage, utilities, living expenses and a baby.”

You are not required to take on loans you can’t afford, and you’re definitely not required to have a baby. If you can’t afford it, you probably shouldn’t. If you want a kid, awesome, but acknowledge that it’s your choice, and be aware that it’s expensive.

“This strain causes separation between us. It halts us from being able to live life. We’re too busy paying bills to enjoy our youth. Forget going to dinner, you have to pay the mortgage. You’ll have to skip out on an anniversary gift this year because those student loans are due at the end of the month. Vacations? Not happening.”

Once again, why did you get a mortgage you couldn’t afford?

Ugh. Officially annoyed. I should have just avoided this entire section, because the way people are about money really bugs me. Don’t do stuff if you can’t afford it. It’s that simple. You aren’t entitled to a house. You aren’t entitled to anything. And if you and your spouse are going to both agree to do stuff you can’t afford, don’t complain when things are stressful!

3) We’re more connected than ever before, but completely disconnected at the same time.

“You told your wife you made dinner reservations … through a text message.

Your husband had flowers delivered to your job … through an app on his phone.

You both searched for furnishings for your new home … on Pinterest.

There’s no physical connection attached to anything anymore.”

Here he lists out a bunch of stuff without saying why any of it is bad. Yeah, I text my friends. Yeah, I read their words instead of hearing their voices. So what? I’m also able to talk to them all day long while working. I’m also able to leave funny messages for them at night so they’ll smile and see them when they wake up in the morning. Because of texting, I’m available to communicate to the people who matter most to me—some of whom live states away.

“We’ve developed relationships with things, not each other. Ninety-five percent of the personal conversations you have on a daily basis occur through some type of technology. We’ve removed human emotion from our relationships, and we’ve replaced it colorful bubbles.”

Sorry but this is just wrong. I’ve shared very deep emotions and had wonderful conversations that brought me closer to people–all through text. Just because you don’t know how to pick up on emotion or express it using the written word doesn’t mean no one does.

“You want to know why your grandmother and grandfather just celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary? Because they weren’t scrolling through Instagram worrying about what John ate for dinner. They weren’t on Facebook criticizing others. They weren’t on vacation sending Snapchats to their friends.”

Actually, that’s not even close to the reason. But you hate technology. We get it.

4) Our desire for attention outweighs our desire to be loved.

“Social media, however, has given everyone an opportunity to be famous. Attention you couldn’t dream of getting unless you were celebrity is now a selfie away. Post a picture, and thousands of strangers will like it. Wear less clothing, and guess what? More likes.

It’s more than that though. What about the life you live? I see pictures of people decked out in designer clothes, posted up in some club with fancy drinks — People that I know are dead broke. But they portray themselves as successful because, well, they can. And they get this gratification from people who like and comment on their statuses or pictures.”

So, because the people you know are pathetic and narcissistic, that means social media is ruining everyone’s relationships? Come on D’Ambrosio. The majority of people are not like this, and you have to know that.

5) Social media just invited a few thousand people into bed with you.

“We’ve invited strangers into our homes and brought them on dates with us. We’ve shown them our wardrobe, drove with them in our cars, and we even showed them our bathing suits. Might as well pack them a suitcase, too.”

He once again made a point without demonstrating why this is a bad thing. I do agree that spending too much time photographing and posting can remove you from the moment. However, snapping a quick pic or two and then taking the five seconds it takes to upload to Instagram is not a big deal. Some people become addicted to social media, sure. But people can become addicted to anything. I don’t personally know anyone who has had their relationship end because of normal use of social media.

Why Marriage Doesn’t Work for Everyone Anymore: My Personal Opinion

Notice I said “for everyone.” Marriage obviously does work for plenty of people, so implying that it never works is just silly. I do, however, think the expectation of a lifelong marriage is unrealistic for many people, and viewing it as something that will happen for all of us one day if we just believe is problematic. A lot of marriages will eventually end, and there are obvious reasons for that. D’Ambrosio, in my opinion, missed most of them.

  1. No Stigma for Divorce

A lot of people in past generations stayed together simply because they felt they had to, not because their lives were a blissful paradise free of social media.

     2. No Stigma for Staying Single

These days, it’s possible to live a full and happy life, and even have an active sex life, without ever being romantically involved with anyone. Sure, a few people might think you’re weird, but who cares?

     3. Everyone is Career Driven

Those with careers can of course get married, but when people are financially self-sufficient and passionate about what they do, their lives are full and they don’t need a partner to help them avoid boredom or provide them with money. They might still want a partner, but not needing one makes a big difference.

    4. Drug and Mental Health Problems

Most people I know, myself included, have battled with addiction or mental-health issues at one point or another. It’s difficult to be in love when someone is dealing with stuff like that, and sadly, a lot of relationships end up destroyed. I’ve personally lost someone I once loved very much due to these issues.

     5. A Clashing of Cultures

In the United States, we have many different cultures. Two people in the same neighborhood can be raised differently and have two opposing views on how life should be. We all have our own thoughts on everything, from God to food to what to watch on TV. You don’t have to be exactly the same as your partner, but marriage is hard enough without one of you being a militant atheist and the other being a Christian. With so many different types of people and no set values that we all share, it’s hard to find a match.

     6. People are just Assholes

I wish we could be honest about this. A lot of people just suck. They’re dumb, they’re mean, they’re selfish, and they make poor choices. Maybe they’ll even hit you or sexually abuse you. A lot of us have been hurt one too many times, and we’re backing away from the idea of marriage because we don’t want to have to go through it again.

     7. No Respect for Sex

Whether you think casual sex is right or wrong, you can’t deny that getting it is pretty easy if your standards are low enough. In a world of instant Tinder dates, webcam girls, and thousands upon thousands of hours of free porn, there isn’t much reason to leave the house—let alone commit to someone for life.

And maybe that’s okay. Maybe instead of spending so much time pondering why marriage isn’t working for a lot of people these days, we should take a step back and ask ourselves why we want it to. What good is it doing us to have all these people trying to get and stay married when it’s so damn hard? What’s the point?

I’m not saying there isn’t a point. Just that we should ponder it for ourselves rather than blindly accepting the idea that marriage is simply something you do. It isn’t for everyone, and that’s okay. Rather than feeling pressured, take some time to consider what’s driving you to want marriage in the first place. It might give you some perspective that will help you if you ever do get married.

D’Ambrosio did say one thing I agreed with:

“Marriage is sacred. It is the most beautiful sacrament and has tremendous promise for those fortunate enough to experience it. Divorced or not, I am a believer in true love and building a beautiful life with someone.”

 

Despite everything I said here today, I do feel that marriage is sacred. I’m really enjoying my time as a single person, but if I meet a nice man one day, and we find our groove together, I’m at peace with being a wife, too. If I ever say “yes” to a proposal, I’m going to mean it from the depths of my heart–otherwise, I won’t be afraid to say no. We now live in a world where people have options, and that’s a beautiful thing.

Review: Far from the Madding Crowd [Film]

Far from the Madding Crowd is a period film set in England in the late 1800s. It’s about a young, independent woman named Bathsheba Everdene, who inherits a farm and ends up in a position to attract three very different suitors. The first is Gabriel Oak, a shepherd who meets Ms. Everdene as her neighbor but then ends up working for her after an unfortunate incident with his sheep causes him to lose everything. The second is Mr. William Boldwood, a handsome older man with plenty of money and resources to offer. Then there is Sergeant Francis Troy, a soldier with a bad-boy attitude.

The film stars Carrey Mulligan (Ms. Everdene) , Mathew Schoenaerts (Gabriel Oak, the first suitor), Michael Sheen (William Boldwood, the second suitor), Tom Sturridge (Sergeant Troy, the third suitor), and Juno Temple (Fanny, Troy’s lost love from before he met Ms. Everdene). It’s based on the book by Thomas Hardy. Here is the IMDB page for the film and the Amazon page for the book.

 Warning: This review contains some spoilers!

 What I liked:

The setting was gorgeous. It doesn’t get much more romantic than the English countryside! One of my favorite things about period films is that they usually feature a lot of pretty scenery, and this one was no different.

I also really liked Ms. Everdene, at least at first. She had some fierce independence going, which is great to see, especially during a time in history when women weren’t respected as equals. I’m big on independence, as you can probably tell if you’ve read my “single life” blog series, so right away I related. Then of course there was Mr. Oak. He was gorgeous, and the chemistry between the pair captured my attention.

What I didn’t like:

After Ms. Everdene meets Sergeant Troy, the story took a strange turn. Her falling for Troy was bizarre and seemed to clash with her independent nature. He was cute enough, I guess, and I get that a lot of women are enticed by the bad boy. But also the whole “meet me in the woods so I can almost kill you with my sword” foreplay was just too weird for me. She had already turned down two nice, handsome suitors, and then she marries this guy? It just didn’t make sense. Also, this is probably just me, but if a guy ever sliced off a lock of my hair like that, they’d never find his body.

Troy was an interesting character, though, because he wasn’t a full-on bad guy, but he wasn’t that good, either. He clearly could be an ass, and he had a gambling problem, but he did seem to feel true love for Fanny. In fact, I almost felt that Troy and Fanny deserved their own story instead of being crammed into this one.

I would have liked it better without William Boldwood as well. Not because I didn’t like him, but because I did like him and couldn’t stand to see him hurt. It was his own choice to kill Troy in the end, but everything that led up to it seemed unfair to him.

Basically, I would have liked the story much better had Ms. Everdene simply said yes to Gabriel right at the start. He was SO attractive, smart, kind, and sweet. I guess “woman receives lamb from cute guy and gets married” would have amounted to a five-minute movie. It was satisfying to see them finally come together, but knowing Mr. Boldwood likely spent the rest of his life rotting alone in a prison cell really put a damper on their happily ever after, at least for me.

This movie makes a strong point that is undeniably true: Love can be complicated, painful, and often leaves a huge mess behind.

Rating: 4 stars for beautiful cinematography, great acting, and a frustrating-but-juicy story.

PS. If you’ve read the book, was it similar to the film? I was thinking the book might explain a bit more about the relationship with Troy and what was going through Ms. Everdene’s head. If you have any thoughts on the film or the book, please leave a comment.

Goodbye 2015!

I’m happy 2015 is coming to an end. A lot of unpleasant stuff happened this year, but a lot of good too! I made the long drive home to California after living in Denver for a while, published my first novel, and got to spend time with friends and family I hadn’t seen in ages.

I made a lot of hard choices this year, and I have zero regrets on any of them. It has taken a great deal of effort, but I’m very happy with the person I am, the direction I’m headed, my awesome friendships, and most importantly, the relationship I have with God. I am so blessed to have God’s love in my life.

I also wanted to quickly take the time to thank everyone who has supported EDGE OF SOMETHING MORE this year. Your kind words and positive reviews mean everything to me. You are truly the #PeopleWhoMadeMy2015 and I can’t thank you enough.

Looking forward to starting 2016 off single, centered, and ready to work toward some exciting goals.

Have a safe and happy new year, everyone!

IMG_20151212_234139